The Adventure of the Half-Open (Closed?) Door


May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. Romans 5:13, ESV

We’ve been there—asking God to “open” doors or to “close” them.

But what happens when the door stares at us with a half-cocked sneer? That moment when the door is clearly not open, but it’s certainly not closed either. If you’re like me, you’re tempted to think half-open (or closed) doors are a non-answer from God…or are they?

May I submit to you that the answer to a half-cocked door is this: Trust the Owner of the door.

Trust God in the Waiting…

Trust God’s timing…

But above all,

Trust God…He knows your unknowns and will work in your life for your good to His glory.

Two Pink Lines

I’ve stood in front of half-cocked doors before. Twelve years ago, I was a newly-wed of seven years. We were enjoying our time as a couple. Translation? While I spent my days climbing the corporate ladder, Hubby was in school and student teaching aaaand working.

We decided “No kids.” While my husband’s thinking was “Not now,” I was thinking more like “Not EVER.”

But God had other plans…

When the time came to investigate the case of “the missing period,” I took a pregnancy test with fingers crossed hoping for a “No.” But when I looked that little stick, the answer was clear as day—two pink lines pointing right at me. Yikes.

So, I showed my hubby. We were prepared to…get prepared. My doctor repeated the test, yet they didn’t get the same result. Blood tests were ordered.

I went directly over to the hospital expecting that nurse to tell me my answer NOW. You know what she said instead? “Come back in one week and we will re-draw.” That was it. I was standing in front of a half-cocked door, and I was irritated. It wasn’t brain surgery—I just wanted to know whether or not I was pregnant. How hard could that be?  A simple “Yes” or “No” would have been perfect. Instead, I was slapped with “Wait and see.”


Between the Lines

God knew what He was doing in the wait. While we waited for Friday to come, my hubby and I started our preparation. Soon, preparation became dreaming. That week changed me from a “Not EVER” kids point of view to “We will be great parents.”

Except, when the nurse came into the room after the re-draw, she said I wasn’t pregnant. She explained that I probably had a miscarriage during the wait. Initially, the pregnancy hormone was so low they needed to see if it would go up in a week’s time. She confirmed I was pregnant, but not anymore—the hormone level returned to zero. Door closed.

Today, I’m standing in front of another half-cocked door.

I had an MRI to figure out some answers, but instead I am left with more questions. They said they saw an “artifact” which the doctor translated to be “probably nothing.” He said it was a shadow that may have happened if I moved during the exam or a possible error with the machine, yet we are to “watch for symptoms” according to the radiologist. And consider re-testing in three to six months.

Half-cocked door.

Is it something or is it nothing-that’s all I wanted to know. But my answer is “I don’t know.” What do you do with that?

Here’s what I did—I put on trust. I stand trusting the all-knowing God of everything. Because it’s all I can do. And truth be told, it’s all any of us can ever do.

And you know something? I’m learning that trusting God in all I don’t have a handle on is enough, because He is enough to handle it all! The God who grants peace through the hope He offers to needy, sinful people is all you or I ever really need. Jesus’ blood restores us to God—God said so.

So, I am hanging on to the God of hope.

The doors on earth lose their importance knowing God has “prepared a place” for me in glory with Him behind the door of Heaven that stands wide open for those who love Him.

Photo Credit


Where you might find me:
Live Free Thursday with Suzie Eller

Rara Linkup With Kelly

Three Word Wednesday with Kristin

4 thoughts on “The Adventure of the Half-Open (Closed?) Door

  1. Christy, I love this post, the thought of what you do when you are in limbo. It’s so good. I also pray that you don’t have to wait three to six months, and that they just retake this test so you can have peace of mind.


  2. I love the idea of putting on trust! That is something we/I forget that I am not wearing it until I stop my frantic thoughts and realize, ‘where’d trust go?’ and see it sitting abandoned on the floor, just waiting to be picked up and put on.


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